Most people pleasers don’t think of themselves as selfish. They think of themselves as kind. Considerate. Easygoing. Low-maintenance. They don’t want to rock the boat. They don’t want to be a burden. They don’t want to disappoint anyone. For many anxious people, people pleasing is framed as a virtue, something to be proud of. You’re flexible. You’re accommodating. You’re “good.” Over time, something starts to crack. Resentment builds. Exhaustion sets in. Intimacy feels off. You start wondering why you feel unseen in relationships where you’re always showing up.

If someone you love has OCD, you’ve probably found yourself asking some version of: Am I helping or hurting? Should I answer this question? What do I say when they’re panicking? Most loved ones genuinely want to help and most accidentally end up supporting the OCD instead. Not because they’re doing something wrong but because OCD is very good at recruiting other people.

A lot of people say they’re “bad at dating”, but most of the time, they’re not bad at dating, they’re just dating from anxiety instead of curiosity. They’re focused on; saying the right thing, not being too much, not messing it up, and making sure the other person likes them, instead of asking a much more important question. Do I actually like this person?

Let’s be honest: most New Year’s resolutions are just shame in a sparkly hat. In this post, I talk about how goal-setting can go sideways—especially for folks with ADHD, OCD, or anxiety—and how I’m learning to do it differently. No 5 AM routines. No “new you.” Just realistic, self-compassionate ways to move through the year without burning out (or ghosting your to-do list by February).

Let’s be real: I love avoiding things. Who doesn’t? If I can sidestep something uncomfortable, my brain immediately cheers like it just won the lottery. Here’s the problem: avoidance works a little too well in the short term — and that’s exactly why it makes anxiety worse in the long run.

If you live with OCD, you might feel like your brain is a full-time detective — except it’s less Sherlock Holmes and more conspiracy theorist with a cork board full of red string.But what if there was another approach that focused on the thoughts themselves, not just the compulsions? Enter ICBT (Inference-Based Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) — an OCD-specific intervention with no exposures.

Living with ADHD can feel like juggling fire while riding a unicycle — on a tightrope. The good news? Small tweaks, tricks, and systems can make a huge difference in getting through the day without burning out. The bad news? Our brains get bored with the same strategy over and over. Below is a collection of tried-and-true ADHD hacks for daily life and for staying focused in school. Think of it as a toolbox — pick the ones that work for you, leave the rest.

Getting diagnosed with ADHD at 27 didn’t just change how I function—it changed how I see myself. Here’s what I learned about medication, stigma, and self-acceptance.